it's hard to admit you have an addition. one may be in denial. my addiction is alcohol. yes, i am an alcoholic. i don't wanna tell people anymore that i quit drinking because i didn't. it's not easy to quit. i've tried numerous times. i first experienced it when i was 5. the first time i was drunk was 14. since then i've been an alcoholic; whether it be at school, home, or at a friends house. i need to get my shit together. i'm messed up in the head right now (as i'm typing this blog). i do crazy shit when i'm like this. i don't think.. i KNOW a lot of this has to do because of my experience in iraq. i remember not so long ago i walked around the neighborhood at like 5am with a loaded gun tucked in my wasit just waiting for something to happen. crazy stuff. alcohol helps me forget what i did out there but at random times it reminds me of the evil things i've done. maybe i didn't drink the right stuff? maybe i drank too much? i don't know. i just need some shit to help me forget without making me resort to alcohol all the time.
sincerely,
wutever.
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